Day 471 Feeling a Bit Strange Today

I am not sure what is going on with me. Just feeling strange. Restless is more like it. I want to do something and then I do not want to do anything. My mail from Boston is starting to arrive. The real world is catching up with me. Bills, bills and more bills. All I want to do is smoke cigarettes. The thoughts of drinking keep coming into my head. I am just rambling here. Maggie is back from Doggie day care. She has been unusually quiet. Well that is all for now. I am even to restless to even ramble on here. God what do I want to be when I grow up? Will I ever grow up? Peter Pan Syndrome.